My Forever Crew

Thinking about taking a boat trip, especially one as long as the Northwest Passage, can be daunting. As you have read in some of the crew’s other posts, the planning is extensive. There are so many details that must be considered and contingencies that must be planned for. Interestingly, all the questions to me or the crew are about those obvious things to plan for and worry about; how much food to bring, what spare engine parts to bring, how much is enough fuel and water, how to plan for weather, how to clear customs, and the list goes on. What gets lost is perhaps the most difficult part of all. Leaving home without your family.

I spent most of my career traveling for work, leaving loved ones behind in the name of earning a living and providing for them. It was hard to leave but I didn’t feel as though I had any choice. The hard part of this trip is that I do in fact have a choice. I didn’t have to take this trip; I wanted to take this trip. That is inherently selfish, and no one wants to think of themselves as selfish. This trip will be two plus months and could stretch to three depending on weather and unpredictable factors. This is entirely different.

Enter Stacy. Stacy and I have been together for a while, and it’s been wonderful. She is a stunning beauty. She loves life at sea and fishing. She loves to entertain and she loves to laugh and boy do we laugh …a lot. In short, she is a rare combination of awesome for a man with a boat.  And now I am proud to say she has agreed to be my wife! She is amazing on so many levels, and I am beyond lucky to have her in my life. So, what does that have to do with this trip? Everything.

Stacy isn’t in the position of the widow-walking wives and girlfriends of mariners in days gone by, leaving on multi-year expeditions to hunt for whales or explore new ways to go around the world to hopefully return years later. Those women gritted their teeth and helped prepare their men for those long and often perilous voyages. They had to; it was their men’s livelihood. This voyage is not only optional, but a privilege and sadly one that Stacy wasn’t free to take with me. This was hard because as much as I wanted to take this trip, I know I will miss her terribly and worse, my leaving will be hard on her.

I have known wives whose response to their husband’s request “honey, Joe wants me to go sailing Saturday for a few hours. Is that ok?”  was, “You do what you think is RIGHT honey.”  Well, we all knew what that meant; I am not saying no, but if you go, your life will be miserable for the foreseeable future. Stacy simply said something like “Wow, I am really going to miss you. Now, let’s get to planning this so you don’t starve!” 

She then worked hard for days and days with me preparing food. She introduced me to canning and then helped me can 250 pounds of food that can be stored at room temperature and prepared in minutes. She helped menu plan and then started looking for places to join me in Alaska when we get to the other side. Yes, there were tears from time to time, but never “don’t go” and never words to try and make me feel guilty. On top of taking care of kids, the dog, the house, and her very stressful job, she remained supportive.

As I write this, away from her on the open sea, I realize more than ever how lucky I am and how hard I am going to work to support her dreams. So, Stacy? Thank you. Thank you for your support in this; it means everything to me. Thanks for being the love of my life.